Hongkongers have a number of amusing and/or annoying little habits (depending on how much of a hurry you are in) which alone probably don't justify a whole blog post but together make a nice little profile.
1. Interviewing fruit
I am always staggered at the supermarket by how long Hongkongers spend examining their fruit before deciding to take it. Usually, I give fruit a quick turn to check all sides for blemishes, and unless there is anything major I'm pretty much okay with it. By contrast, Hongkongers don't just give their fruit a cursory once over - they look deep into its soul, as if divining its path from tree to supermarket. I am not sure what they are looking for - perhaps they fear that they are trapped in The Matrix and are looking for signs of pixellation or motion blur.
2. Apologising for no reason
This is probably one inherited from the British. The locals are continuously apologising to me for everything and nothing. This is most common in the corridors at my office, where people who are not even close to getting in my way are constantly apologising for being in my way. This is very disconcerting to me. Frankly anyone who knows me knows that getting in my way frequently constitutes a public service.
3. Opening the box
If you ever buy electronics in Hong Kong, always allow time to go through the compulsory ritual of opening the box and checking that every single component is there. I have actually had the guy put batteries in a camera and turn it on for a quick test run. On its face, this seems like the act of a kindly shopkeeper who wants to ensure customer satisfaction; what it actually means is that there is no frigging way they are going to allow you to return it for credit. You're a long way from the Trade Practices Act here, son.
4. Closing the lift doors
For slow walkers, Hongkongers are in one hell of a hurry. There is a certain breed of impatient Hongkonger who makes it their duty to stab the "doors close" button of the lift approximately 0.3 seconds after the doors have opened on any floor that is not their destination. Several times I have had to fling my hands into the closing doors while a guy inside the lift who can quite clearly see me holds down the close button in a battle of button versus infrared sensor.
5. Agreeing but not agreeing
Explaining what you want to a call centre operator is hard enough in Australia. In Hong Kong it is made rather more tricky by the fact that English is likely the operator's second language and they often have difficulty if the conversation goes off script for any reason. Now of course this is much more my fault than theirs, given that I can speak all of five words of Cantonese. However, what is annoying is their tendency to save face by just agreeing to whatever it is you just said. After a while you get to recognise the reluctant "mmm" which means "I have no idea what you just said but I'm going to keep agreeing until you hang up."
6. Throat clearing
Hongkongers look down on mainlanders for their habit of spitting in the street. Hong Kong men would never be so gauche. They know to wait until they are in a public bathroom, at which point they let rip with the loudest, most unselfconscious loogey-hucking I have ever heard. I don't know if these guys smoke, have bronchitis or what but they are sure as hell not going to suffer in silence.
7. Sleeping on your desk
I cannot fathom this one - I have trouble sleeping in an armchair or on a plane. Hongkongers by contrast are happy to just move their keyboard to one side and fall asleep forehead down on the desk. For the record, if you approach a co-worker who is snoozing at their desk at lunchtime, it is considered rude to leave the report they asked for on their shoulder blades.
1. Interviewing fruit
I am always staggered at the supermarket by how long Hongkongers spend examining their fruit before deciding to take it. Usually, I give fruit a quick turn to check all sides for blemishes, and unless there is anything major I'm pretty much okay with it. By contrast, Hongkongers don't just give their fruit a cursory once over - they look deep into its soul, as if divining its path from tree to supermarket. I am not sure what they are looking for - perhaps they fear that they are trapped in The Matrix and are looking for signs of pixellation or motion blur.
2. Apologising for no reason
This is probably one inherited from the British. The locals are continuously apologising to me for everything and nothing. This is most common in the corridors at my office, where people who are not even close to getting in my way are constantly apologising for being in my way. This is very disconcerting to me. Frankly anyone who knows me knows that getting in my way frequently constitutes a public service.
3. Opening the box
If you ever buy electronics in Hong Kong, always allow time to go through the compulsory ritual of opening the box and checking that every single component is there. I have actually had the guy put batteries in a camera and turn it on for a quick test run. On its face, this seems like the act of a kindly shopkeeper who wants to ensure customer satisfaction; what it actually means is that there is no frigging way they are going to allow you to return it for credit. You're a long way from the Trade Practices Act here, son.
4. Closing the lift doors
For slow walkers, Hongkongers are in one hell of a hurry. There is a certain breed of impatient Hongkonger who makes it their duty to stab the "doors close" button of the lift approximately 0.3 seconds after the doors have opened on any floor that is not their destination. Several times I have had to fling my hands into the closing doors while a guy inside the lift who can quite clearly see me holds down the close button in a battle of button versus infrared sensor.
5. Agreeing but not agreeing
Explaining what you want to a call centre operator is hard enough in Australia. In Hong Kong it is made rather more tricky by the fact that English is likely the operator's second language and they often have difficulty if the conversation goes off script for any reason. Now of course this is much more my fault than theirs, given that I can speak all of five words of Cantonese. However, what is annoying is their tendency to save face by just agreeing to whatever it is you just said. After a while you get to recognise the reluctant "mmm" which means "I have no idea what you just said but I'm going to keep agreeing until you hang up."
6. Throat clearing
Hongkongers look down on mainlanders for their habit of spitting in the street. Hong Kong men would never be so gauche. They know to wait until they are in a public bathroom, at which point they let rip with the loudest, most unselfconscious loogey-hucking I have ever heard. I don't know if these guys smoke, have bronchitis or what but they are sure as hell not going to suffer in silence.
7. Sleeping on your desk
I cannot fathom this one - I have trouble sleeping in an armchair or on a plane. Hongkongers by contrast are happy to just move their keyboard to one side and fall asleep forehead down on the desk. For the record, if you approach a co-worker who is snoozing at their desk at lunchtime, it is considered rude to leave the report they asked for on their shoulder blades.
lol!! i am your reader from hong kong:)
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